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I was inspired the other day by a post from a friend on Facebook. She tagged a few people with a confession of sorts about things she regretted, one of them being the way her friendship with me ended.
It got me thinking about regret. And since Thursday’s are for thinking out loud… here you go.
I suppose there are certain, specific actions of mine that I regret. Being judgmental when I was younger, yes I regret that. Not keeping in touch with certain friends who were always supportive of me. Harsh words are people who don’t deserve it. Definitely regret that.
Then there are the bigger life decisions. Should we regret those?
Going back to school, but taking on debt.
Making a career move that might not pan out.
Taking a chance on someone and not getting what you wanted out of it.
I say no.
There is a difference in feeling regret, and living with regret.
You might feel regret as a side effect as ‘Maybe I shouldn’t have done that’ runs through your head. But, we shouldn’t live with regret for the choices we’ve made. Accept your choices, and know that you can and HAVE learned from them.
No matter what happens, you can move on. No matter how bad, there is always a way to get through it.
Our choices in life have made us who we are. How do you know your life would be any better if you did it another way?
You can always change what you do in the future.
Call you old friends you’ve lost touch with.
Put down your phone to play with your kids.
Speak up at work.
Quit the job that isn’t working for you.
Go back to school.
Travel more.
Be more independent.
I honestly have no decisions I regret. My life is pretty great. I’ve learned a lot along the way, but know I have a LOT of learning left to do.
Be confident in your choices, no matter the outcome. You will learn, and you will grow.
Amazing post Alysia and such a great reminder, especially being a recent graduate and thinking "now what"?! Thank you for this 🙂
I love everything about this post. I recently made a big life decision that I can't pretend I don't worry will be a regret in the future, but life isn't stagnant, and you can always change, make a shift and get back on course. Thanks for the reminder!
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such a great attitude around this, I think we all struggle with not wanting to live in that regret.
Love this post, lady! I'm in the same boat as Davida ^^ Recently made some pretty huge changes regarding the career I want to pursue, and I can't pretend like it didn't scare the crap out of me. Heck, sometimes it STILL does. But getting around to actually doing it was the hardest thing, now that I'm on the path and happy with the outcome [so far], I'm glad I decided to take that chance. You never know how life is going to pan out, and one of the worst feelings is looking back and asking "what if… I had actually pursued my dreams."
Such a great post Alysia and so true! Recently, I've been thinking about a career move, but the fear of the unknown has held me back. I should really just make the leap. We only live once!
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I'm glad I found your blog and love this post. You never want to live your life in regret and I often wonder…what if this or what if that. I've come to realize just relaxing and taking time to accept change has done me so well.
"Our choices in life have made us who we are. How do you know your life would be any better if you did it another way?"<—— that. just that. Everything about that statement. Preferably the how do you know it would be any better. Fact is, we don't. Playing the what if game is really dangerous, and a trap that is really easy to get caught up and can consume you (much like the comparison trap).
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I really connect with this post. I've been helping some friends through difficult things recently and the subject of regret has come up. In 9 out of 10 cases, i think that you shouldn't regret things that you do/that happen to you. It all happens for a reason, and we can always/usually move on. Life is a learning process, but you're right – you can't live with regret. That leads to a miserable existence.
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well said friend. Back your YES and believe in the outcome with make you grow. Either way, the risk has its rewards, not regrets
A million times yes!! Life is too short to live with regrets and what ifs! There are no guarantees for a tomorrow.
This post is spot on. You are so right. There is no point in regretting the past when you should be busy living in the present and realizing that you CAN change the future.
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I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason…therefore you never have to live with regrets. Great post.
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This post is awesome! My life motto is "Live life with no regrets" and I totally believe that it's what you have to do. Everything happens for a reason, you usually will learn something from your choices no matter if they are good or bad. Thanks for posting this!
This is such a great post! I agree, living without regrets is the best way to live!
Sometimes doing something you regret is what leads you on to something amazing – I'm a believer in 'everything happens for a reason', even the not-so-great stuff, so I try to consciously live without regret. Easier said than done!
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I love this Alysia!! I totally agree that we shouldn't regret but learn from what we decided in the past. Every experience is enriching, if it is a good one or a difficult/sad one!
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Amen sister! Well said 🙂